Missin' You

Tonight, I am confused. Trusting God has become an effort that needs to be recommitted often. I don't know how, but one day I will be fine and the next day will bring its own new challenges to the surface and without even realizing what has happened, I find myself trying to answer all the questions myself and have somehow tried to 'take control.' Really, deep down, I don't want the control. I would just make a HUGE mess out of everything, I know that! But my sin nature always has other ideas. So, here I am, recommited once more. Recommited to the plan God has for me and trying my best to abide in Him and His will for me. Still, I am confused but I think that is okay. Then I am certain He is control and I am not. That brings a smile to my face.

As the thoughts swirled around in my mind tonight, one thought just kept coming back. That thought was that I REALLY love Jesus and cannot wait until the day I am in heaven with Him. I will see Him face to face and worship Him forever! THAT, will be the BEST day of my life!

Here is a song that speaks to my heart often on these contemplative nights:

Missin' You
by Chris Rice
I heard about the day You went away
You said You had to go prepare a place
And even though I’ve never seen Your face
I’m missin’ You
I lie awake tonight and I watch the sky
And I wish it didn’t have to be so high
‘Cause I’m belonging on the other side
And I’m missin’ You

‘Cause somewhere behind those stars
Is Someone who belongs to me
And I know in my deepest heart
There’s a place for You until I find the place You made for me
But still I’m missin’ You

I dream about Your promise to return
And I wake up hangin’ on Your every word
But for now my feet are planted here on earth
So I’m missin’ You
And even while they say that I’m a fool
I know you see me waiting here for You
Oh, and prayin’ that somehow You’ll get here soon
‘Cause I’m missin’ You

‘Cause somewhere behind those stars
Is Someone who belongs to me
And I know in my deepest heart
There’s a place for You until I find the place You made for me
But still I’m missin’ You

How much longer will it be
Till I get to see you
Though I know you’re right here with me
Tell me when can I be there with you

‘Cause somewhere behind those stars
Is Someone who belongs to me
And I know in my deepest heart
There’s a place for You until I find the place You made for me
But still I’m missin’ You

Oh, I’m missin’ You
Lord, I’m missin’ You

Tough memories

This probably sounds like its a bad thing but it is not. I got to chat online with Hiromi today and it was such a blessing! It made me miss Japan so much though. I miss her and her family especially but I also miss the people there and the culture. I actually started crying when she mentioned that her mom said I should come back and visit. I told her that she had no idea how much I would love to do that. I still have a heart for Japan-- for the people there to know Christ and for the Christians to be encouraged. I just wonder what God is doing in my life. I am having a hard time being patient today but I KNOW He is working out His will in my life. I also know that His will for me is to be here in New Jersey. Specifically, His will is for me to clean the church today. His will for me in the future is no greater than His will for me today. I need to constantly be reminded of that.
In Sunday School a while back, the story of David and Goliath was presented to the children. I was struck with a truth that I had never seen before. Every day it was God's will that David be an ordinary shepherd. I am sure he didn't think he was anything special and probably wondered if He could ever be used by God. What he didn't know was that God was preparing him for the future. He faced and defeated a lion and a bear and someday he would defeat the GIANT Goliath and in what seemed like one moment, God had been glorified. I believe that God was glorified in every step of the process up to that point. Sometimes we need to just keep plugging away and trust God completely that He is working out His will in our lives and it is usually a lot different than we would like it or think it should be. Honestly, I wouldn't want it any other way.
I love this blog! It gives me an opportunity to really preach to myself and keep a record of all these ways that God speaks to my heart.
Well, Hiromi and the Takahashi family, know that I love you and miss Japan very much. You are doing a great work there in the Lord. When I read Acts 14:21-28 this afternoon I thought of you, Mr Takahashi. Stay strong, all of you, and He will be there to guide and strengthen you.
Love you,
Liz

lonely night

There is something about Sunday nights that gets to me. It's not every Sunday, but every now and then, it just feels so lonely. I think it is because everything leading up to the 'big event' on Sunday is jam packed and there is so much to get done. The joy of Sunday morning is so wonderful and it is very much the highlight of my week. But on the opposite end of the spectrum, the evening comes. The house is quiet and I am usually too tired to start a project so I feel like whatever I do will be a waste of my time. This Sunday is particularly sad because Megan left to go pack to PA. I had a buddy to spend time with for a whole 24 hours and then she left. So here I am. I think I am just going to pray and spend time with my Best Friend. He IS Comfort...

What a wonderful night!

Tonight was incredible! Chelsea and I sang "I Will Rise" for the Maundy service . It meant so much to me . It is such a powerful song! It also seemed to be a blessing to a lot of people which is what I was praying for. The pastor asked if we would be willing to sing it again on Sunday. :) Of course, we would LOVE to but they need to figure out how to work it into the already full service. I am also excited that the deacons were unanimously in support of assisting me financially to get my private pilots' license but the details have yet to be figured out . I am very excited that this looks like it may actually happen! One can only hope, dream, wait and see :)